The Woman That Every Man Needs.



Reason for Tha Mish Factor

When I started this blog it was mainly for myself. I’m not much of a writer. Ok who am I kidding I’ve been writing since I was in primary school. It was a form of an escape to me after I finished reading most of my mother’s novels. Most because some she wouldn’t let me read some books. (I read Danielle Steel’s Mirror Image behind her back and then cried cause it’s such a beautiful book. I recommend it) Anyway my cousin and an old friend have been nagging me to make this blog public so I’m going to start blogging a lot and sharing the links.


This might suprise a few people because my previous posts start with “hi guys” and end with a song I’m currently listening to, well that’s because I knew that at some point this baby was gon go public.


I hope you enjoy my thoughts, ideas and how I put into words whatever life throws at me. I’ll also be sharing posts or poems or whatever interesting things I come across.

Sidebar: I’m really bad at titling and even as I write this I have no idea what I’ma call this post.

When you accept less, people have no reason to give you more.

The title of this post is a quote. I came across it at a time when it was not relevant but now it is.

Hello guys.
Late greetings yes. The thing is Im just all sorts of irritated at the choices I’ve made. Excuse me a little bit. *sips on imaginary beer*

Anyway I’ve had a lot of free time on my hands and it really got me thinking about the nonsense I’ve been taking on a platter. The past 7 months might be a reason I will no longer be a very understanding and patient person.

Because of these traits I’ve accepted less, because I thought it will get better. It didn’t get better. I never received more. Because promises were made that weren’t kept. And still I remained understanding. It’s true, people end up not having a reason to give you more. I never gave this particular person a reason to give me more.

Sometimes it’s just better to hit the ground running. Demand what you know is yours and you’ve worked for it from the word go. It is just better. People take advantage of your good traits. Don’t let them. Because they believe you are young, foolish, inexperienced, naive or whatever they can come up with. Their opinions do not define you.

It really is just BS to put oneself in such situations. Alas lesson learned.

So Im currently listening to Pink – Sober.

In limbo

Hi guys

I just realised that the worst thing that could happen when in a relationship is not knowing where you stand. 15 months into it and you cant speak your mind freely. It’s like walking on egg shells. You are not who you really are.

You find yourself questioning why you’re still in this shit. It really is a shitty feeling. But what’s even worse is realising that you are not going anywhere. Your union is stale and it is just not fucken growing. The frustration is enough to make one chop off their fingers and smile at the sight of blood. Because you have to feel something, anything really.

There is so much going on in the world it’s so unreal. Everyone is going through their own shit sometimes worrying about relationships is the last thing on your mind. It was for me for about 2 years. When you been single for that long it is kind of hard to, all of a sudden, prioritise a stupid relationship with a man that you dont even know what he’s thinking half the time.

I had to worry about my career, my studies. For a long while getting dicked down was of no use to me. So even today when he disappears for two days I find it hard to pick up the phone and lick his ass. My people say Im cold but hey it is a cold world yo.

Anyway relationships are beautiful things most of the time. Sometimes we just end up with the wrong people. But at the end it is important to know where you stand and if you are okay. Because you will lift your head and face another day.

Currently listening to India Arie’s Nature. Im so in love with this track.

I am not that active on twitter. But here is my handle @_Mish101. I tweet a lot about sex(randomly) and my everyday life. Would love hearing from you guys.

Also, submitions are allowed. If you have anything to share you can email me at and I will try my outmost best to post the articles on this blog. It is IdeasAndWhatNots for a reason so yea anything goes.

Love is…

So in my 19years of living *giggles* I been in love like twice. Yes only twice. For one I’m not those people who believe I’m in love 4 weeks into a relationship. 4 weeks is a month guys and I don’t believe in love at first sight too. I just can’t comprehend how one loves that which they don’t know. Love is knowledge. I’m not bashing other people’s ideas of concepts of love. Look, to each his own right? Right.

Anyway this is purely based on personal experiences. I had someone tell me love is forgiveness. That when you love someone you find it easier to forgive them. Is this true?? Is it really? I guess.
People’s definition of love will never ever be the same. Love is love is love.

Love is falling asleep with a smile on your face because he laughed at your silliness that you don’t find all too silly. Love is wanting to bottle his scent and take it with you. Love is him planting a kiss at the back of your neck with the stars above you. Love is simple. Love is pure. Love is dirty. Love is blissful and sinful. Love is definetly standing by the balcony, 12am, discussing aliens and reincarnation while sharing a cigarette. Love is for you and it’s for me.

Love will always be the reason and the answer.

Love is (insert his or her name)

SideBar: I haven’t trully appreciated the beauty that is Beyonce’s Smash Into You and Alicia Keys’ Fire We Make.

Inherited shame: Forbidden Parths

Hello you guys.

So a lot has been said about fucking/dating a married wo/man. This lot being that people are judged for getting involved with mostly a married man. Women also cheat but then when do you ever hear a man being crucified for being with a married woman?

Anyway I was seating with a friend just the other day enjoying a meal and soaking our blood in alcohol when a grown married man joined us and started chatting up friend. I say married cause he had a wedding band on but listen he was talking like a single man. Actually not too much cause he spoke of t’s & c’s. When to call her and such things.

I find it interesting. That nowadays cheating is not a taboo. But why should it be? Are we conditioned to believe that we can’t share partners?

Anyway I’m curious as to why do women always have to take the blame for things that society considers wrong. If my friend ended up with this man, who clearly approached her she’ll be labelled a whore because she liked a (married) man. Never mind that she hadn’t noticed him until he invited his married self to our table.

If a married women is dating outside her marriage she’s the problem also. Never the man that approached her married self. So are women supposed to keep men at bay? It ain’t our job really. *files nails*

Maybe it’s time people have open minds about these inherited shames and taboos. Inherited because we are told it’s wrong. Is it wrong for you because that’s what you been told or because it feels wrong?

No really hey. Do you.

Side chicks and the likes.

Hi guys.

So like anything that I do or start at 2am is never a good idea. Only just the best.

Anyway I came across a tweet on my TL, some young thang talking about how girls go after men knowing very well they taken. This was a tweet from someone who’s always bashing the concept of side chicks and what not.

Now I don’t normally make conclusions about people based on their age but you know if you naive then you are and we can’t save you. Cold world yo.
Alas this tweep likes this side chick phenomen. And I’m sorry but why I wonder, why does people’s choices always seem to bother strangers? Like why is society so judgemental and all of that? I honestly don’t get. *rolls eyes*

Woman in general just love bashing and pulling each other down. No love whatsoever. We fight for dick. Really? A few amazing strokes and we already screaming SPARTAAA! Like do you have a clue how many other women you sharing that dick with?

Honestly just stop blaming other women wen your man cheats. It’s not their fault. This is really simple. It amazes me how this one chick nearly carved my eyes out for a nigga I wasn’t even interested in. ( Needless to say this was 4 years back. I’m done with drama now)

Aaaah yes just live and don’t worry about side chicks and what they do with their cooch since well you the decent perfect girlfriend sister.

PS. I’m currently obsessed wit Sade’s Flow. It’s been on repeat for days. Something about the lyrics. Or because I miss being held thru the night.